There’s a guy who lives above me who has schizophrenia. I
can hear him yelling sometimes. That’s a tough one. I have allergies and that’s
pretty annoying, but imaging instead of every time I blow my nose there’s a
voice in my head talking to me? That’s rough man.
I bought a guitar!!! I had been meaning to once I got my
money in order. It’s still not in order, but like clipping your toenails you
can’t put it off for too long.
I think every guitarist has this fantasy when you go into a
guitar store that it’ll be like that scene from Harry Potter where he’s getting
his wand. You’ll be picking up a guitar and the shop owner will be like “…that
one??... Could it be???” and then you start playing and wailing and there’s like
a whirlwind of picks and straps and papers blowing around you and everyone is
looking at you like you’re the next guitar god and you’ve fulfilled the
prophecy.
It didn’t happen quite like that but I did notice something
special about the guitar as soon as I laid eyes on it. The price tag.
Not too high not too low. I don’t really know anything about
guitar’s or equipment but most of the brands around here are different so I
knew even less. It’s an “Audition” which means nothing to me except the
creatives must have been out of the office that day. It’s pretty, plays well,
and was made in the 60’s, which was a great time to be made into a guitar.
It’ll be a nice outlet for me and my mind juices. Walking
around fields all day really lets you think.
I hopped on a train to Brisbane to do some stand up again.
The open mic was fun and I wrote some new material out in the strawberry
fields. It’ll be cool to perform for people and not just fruit.
It’s also kind of liberating. I had planned on doing it all
week, but at the end of a long day you kinda don’t want to do anything
stressful. You don’t want to put anymore work into anything. But there’s that
Onion article that’s titled “Find the one thing you love doing most and do that
for one hour on the weekend”. And the article is a great lampoon at how you’re “supposed”
to be. You’re supposed to just do your job and then only do what you want on the
weekend. You’re supposed to get a job and pay your rent and those are things
you have to put first.
But I don’t want to do those things. I want to perform. I
don’t even really think stand up is like my thing thing. It’s cool, and I’m ok
at it, but I don’t think I’d have the diligence to ever really be a pro. I ‘d
reserve that for music. But, it’s a lot easier to get stand up stage time than
find and form a band, so this is a nice sedation.
I’m on the train covered in mud and in need of deodorant. I’m
not even sure if trains run after the show finishes. But I’ll figure it out. I’m
smart. I had to wing driving to the train station, even that’s a little
adventure. I think you have to do stuff that makes you uncomfortable sometimes.
It makes you tougher. Makes you better.
I had a coke too, and I’m chipper and buzzing and nervous
and it’s all more… productive? Than being at home and watching the new
community episodes, which aren’t that good anyway.
I want to go on tour. Like really bad. This is practice for
that. Being tired and gross and still having a job to do. The idea of driving
around the country just performing for people? That sounds awesome. See things,
do things. New stuff all the time. Music or comedy, don’t matter to me.
So that was on the train ride before I got there. Now I’m coming back. And I’m coming down from like 2 beers (I don’t drink much anymore), I ate some greasy food, (I thought spring rolls were supposed to have veggie, this was just like some gravy that had been fried) and I’m super tired and the set didn’t go so well. It didn’t go badly. I don’t think I’ve ever bombed. But it wasn’t as good as last time. I got nervous I think, too much caffeine maybe. Everyone on the train kinda looks the same. My shoulders can’t shake the tenseness, I’m slugged up in the corner. I’m wiped.
I thought of a new joke while I was there though. And I met
some people, and I know I just need work on delivery to make some jokes work.
It’s progress, just not the best feeling kind. I’ll do it again. I’ll try to
find a closer open mic too. And I’ll start bringing my guitar or something.
