I quit my job today. I always described it as good work but
bad pay and bad environment. Here’s a picture, the CEO has the song “For The
Love Of Money” by the O-Jays as his ringtone. I prefer the haired-up BulletBoys version. The song derides the sins of money. My CEO makes 150,000 a year and drives a Ferrari. He’s also
stupid. Really really stupid. He has spelling mistakes everywhere, I don’t think
he graduated high school and really the whole company is a little scammy. Not
totally, but I know I wouldn’t use them.
They’re a Forex brokerage, and when I say that Aussies
always go “you work for Four X?” Which is a big brewery, they make a Corona equivalent.
And I say no, people trade currencies like stocks because the values change and
you can make or lose money that way. It’s actually pretty cool because
currencies usually change very little in value, so you have leverage, which
magnifies the changes. You’ll only need to put down 1% of the amount you want
to trade with, so with $1000 I can trade like I have $100,000. And then when
the dollar gains in value by .0001 over a day you can make (or lose) $100.
But frankly, we’re just an OK brokerage at best and there
are better options if you’d want to get into trading. In fact there are a lot
of brokerages, it’s pretty saturated.
Anyway I quit.
Often the CEO and VP throw temper tantrums. Once the CEO
ripped a cord out the ceiling and chunks went everywhere. What a little bitch.
But that’s how they think to manage people. With extreme aggression. There’s
often threats of killing people if they mess up. Not in like a joking way, like
in a screaming in your face way. Lots of sexist and racist jokes, lots of suggestive
sex and drug use. It’s like they watched Wolf of Wall Street once and they’re
just imitating that. Poorly.
So generally just not a good environment to be in. But I was
never the target of this, in fact I think everybody liked me. I kept my head down
and did good work, nobody threatened to kill or rape me. But I knew I wasn’t
going to stay there for too long.
So one night it was 6pm and I usually stay late cuz that’s
what you do, and the VP gives me this huge assignment, which started with “hey
just go over the CRM with the sales people, there’s a lot of new people and
they don’t know what they’re doing”. Well I start talking to the sales team,
and compliance, and the VP. And I found out, nobody knows how a lead turns into
a client. Nobody knows how it all works. Literally every time they get a new
client they’re just winging it.
So what would be a simple, “hey go over a few things” has
now turned into “Define, illustrate and teach our entire business”. Which
frankly makes the CEO and VP obsolete. Like if they don’t know how it’s
happening then what are they doing all day????
And I’m still the only one! I’m the only person who’s
figured out the way we generate revenue. But at this point I was pretty fed up.
I wasn’t going to work all night for two mean idiots who can’t run a business.
So I went out and ate a burrito.
And I came back and sat in my chair. And thought. And after
30 minutes I decided I was quitting. And once my mind’s made up I have to
follow through. There’s no choices after that.
I wish I quit with gusto. I wish I stormed into the VP’s
office and told him off. I wish I screamed at him, about how you can be an
idiot and run a business, and you can be an asshole and run a business, but you
can’t be an idiot and an asshole, and run a business. You can’t treat the
people who make your money like trash. I wish I had burned bridges.
You’re not supposed to, and I always say that no matter what
it’s better to leave on good terms. But I really regret not telling them what I
really think. I feel guilty, as if I did something wrong by not causing a
scene.
Instead, I told him I quit and was moving to the Gold Coast.
He was surprised and his first question was “How much did they offer you?” And
now I was surprised. It wasn’t about the money. Obviously I could lie and maybe
stay and get a raise. I deserved one. But I was committed, I was quitting. I
made up a different lie, where I’m going to live with a friend and surf and
smoke weed all day. He believed me. We bro hugged and said our goodbyes. And left
on peaceful terms.
He was one step ahead of me though. Now I need a new job.
I answered an ad for “A Cofounder for Start Up”. I met with
the team and they seem like nice people with a decent idea. They want to create
an “innovations discovery platform”. I hate all those words, so I like to say
they want to create an online marketplace for really new and unique products.
Because Amazon isn’t really a good browsing experience, and it mainly focuses
on keeping costs low.
Instead, Inpulze wants to make it easier for producers of
cool new products to reach their audience of early adopters and people with a
little extra money who want cool new toys. So they’re connecting these two
groups and want to become the “go-to” for stuff like smart wearables, cups that
change the temperature of the liquid inside them, and some sort of device that
sorts the yolk from the egg.
It’s not a bad idea, but it’s not a particularly good or
unique one either. I’m on board. Not as a cofounder, but I review and write
materials for them since I’m the only native English speaker. I do this pro
bono since they don’t have any money from investors and are in the very early
stages, and really I don’t do too much for them yet. It’s more like planting
the seeds, so if it does take off I can jump on board haha.
Americans are stereotyped as all having startups.
I also applied for a job as a virtual assistant. That’s a
job where you outsource your normal admin work to someone remotely. Usually for
cheaper or if someone’s sick for a while. It’s a pretty good job, well paid and
all I have to do is be near internet and do email, and Office Suite work. And
that seemed a little too good but still reasonable.
Some flags started going up when I started talking to the
guy. First of all, it’s supposed to be a US based company in Chicago. And he
arranged the interview for 2:30 am Chicago time. Weird right? And then I
checked to make sure the address was real, it was. And when I spoke to him he
had pretty bad English. Not that that’s a crime, but a little odd. The
interview was a little too short and standard for me as well. So after I had my
interview I was pretty suspicious. Now when I checked their website it had been
flagged by Open DNS for being malicious. Boom, cooked.
I am genuinely curious about the scammy business so I sent
some info about it to my good buddies and old work place Klink & Co. They
do background checks and stuff like that. Still waiting for the final report on
that, but luckily I didn’t send them any bank info or personal stuff.
Since Melbourne was getting cold, and I was getting old, I
figured it was time to head up north. To Brisbane! Everywhere new is exciting.
I had a little money from the Forex knobs and should head up north before I
lose it all in Melbourne.
It was really hard to leave though! I had to say goodbye to
all these friends I had made over the past 2 months. I didn’t think it would be
bad, but I miss them all. We had a real happy family back there in the Nunnery.
You’d come home from work and you’d check in with everybody and how their day
went, on weekends we’d go on adventures. And I was the first to go. They’ll all
leave eventually, so maybe I’ll see them again in Aus, there’s only one place
to go from Melbourne. Up.
